Over the weekend, I was at home and I my brain was buzzing with all the stuff I wanted to get done that afternoon. I was pretty much puttering around, procrastinating doing anything, and guiltily stealing 15 minute chunks of random TV time. I actually couldn’t just relax because I kept running though the things I wanted to get done (but DIDN’T ACTUALLY WANT TO DO).
So, I went into my office and made a list of all the things I wanted done but didn’t want to do. When my son, Andrew asked me why I was making a list of thing I didn’t want to do, I decisively told him, that I had no idea why I was making the list, because I had no intention of doing any of it.
After the list was complete, I read it, and said to myself, “It’s just fine if you don’t want to do these things, let it go. Relax. There’s nothing pressing here.” All of a sudden my self-judgment** about it was gone.
**that day’s self-judgment: “I’m lazy & unmotivated….blahblahblah…”
Here’s the unexpected (and miraculous?) part: I went down stairs and cleaned the Time Out Room…and did several other things on the list, quite happily and energetically without much thought at all.
It wasn’t until I came back into the office, and saw the list, and just laughed at myself. 5 out of the 7 items on the list were done! Easy, no sweat. I guess I just let go, stopped beating myself up about it, and allowed myself to do the things I really DID want to do after all.
Can you relate? I would love to know…xoxot.